Author’s note: I hope you’re having a great summer! I’ve taken the last few weeks off to spend some extra time with family but am excited about getting back to blogging tonight! Be sure to check out July’s issue of the Faith Footprints E-zine here. The E-zine is free so be sure to share it!
This evening Gary and I were discussing house repairs with another couple and it struck me how easily I lose my perspective when the responsibilities of home ownership pile up. If an observer had heard me complain about of our house they might have thought we live in a crumbling shack ready to be condemned. But we live fairly comfortably in a home that keeps us safe and protects us from the elements. We have cold drafts in the winter but we do not fear that our children will succumb to hypothermia. We do not have central air conditioning, but we have screens on our windows and have little fear that malaria infested mosquitos will infect us while we sleep. We have indoor plumbing and running water that protect us from the cholera that ends hundreds of thousands of lives each year.
Being overwhelmed is something we modern, multitasking mommas have gotten really good at. Most of the time we are overwhelmed by responsibilities that we pile on ourselves. For example, we are about 2/3 of the way through a pantry remodel and are planning on tackling the kitchen next. We picked up some cabinets at 90% off right before we went on vacation and they have been waiting for a new home for over a month. However it is also peak canning season. I have been anxiously trying to estimate my harvest dates, needed supplies, and how to schedule the remodel around Gary’s work schedule. Did I mention that he works with college textbooks and we are moving into his busiest season?
Tonight I finally gave in to common sense and resigned myself to putting the kitchen remodel off until after canning season. Why am I so disappointed about pushing a project back? Before we found the super deal on kitchen cabinets we were not even planning on redoing the kitchen until next summer! Setting unreal expectations is something I find myself doing often. The house needs to be cleaned before we go on with our day, the homework needs to be excellent before I turn it in, and my brokenness needs repaired before I can serve God.
Wait……What do you mean that isn’t what he said?
Psalm 103:14 tells us that God “knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.” He knows where we came from and what we are made from both physically and spiritually. He knows what we did yesterday, last week, and every other day of our lives. Actually he wanted us before we ever existed. A friend who lost children to miscarriage often talks about how much she prayed for her children before they were ever conceived. The loss of her unborn babies made subsequent children loved even more. God feels the same way about us.
Can you imagine the amount of loss and sorrow God has seen? Or the number of times we (as the human race) have walked away from His promise of healing and restoration? Is it possible that he loves us more than ever because of the loss that fills our world?
For most of us it is not hard to believe that he wanted and loved us before we were born. But here’s the crazy part-He still wants us. Even right now in the midst of our brokenness. He knows I will never get to the bottom of my To-Do list. He knows that my fear of disappointing him sometimes creates distance between us. But he also knows that the beauty of my life is not tethered to my abilities or courage. True beauty is found in the reflection of his love and how it continues to grow in spite of my brokenness.
Copyright 2014 AngelaJHerrington